Hey, you. Yeah, YOU.The one with the new baby who won’t sleep.
The one with her light on in the middle of the night. The one who’s been pacing through the house with a tiny red-faced baby. The one who’s now on Google typing in things like “Why won’t my baby sleep?” or “Is my newborn afraid of the dark?” or “How can I get my baby to stay swaddled?”
I sit here, cozy in my own bed, with my little boys tucked into their bunk beds and I think about you. About all of you. Cause let’s face it, there are a whole lot of you out there. Literally, hundreds of thousands of mothers and fathers up at night trying to figure out how to get your baby to sleep.
I’ll tell you right now. I don’t have the solution. There is no simple, easy quick-fix way to get a baby to sleep through the night. (Yeah…sorry about that…)
There have been tons of books written about baby sleep problems. Some promise no crying and some say you just need to let them cry. Read them all if you want to, but I guarantee none of them will hold the key and all of them will make you feel like a crappy parent.
I’ve been where you are. Waking up to see that it’s only been 45 minutes since the last time you got up and did your new night-time routine of feeding, burping, changing, feeding, swaddling and putting back to sleep. I have been in that glider, with my nursing pillow, falling asleep while breastfeeding because the exhaustion was winning.
It sucks. I know.
I also know that it likely won’t make you feel better to hear me say that “this too shall pass”. But, it will. Eventually you’ll sleep again! Even if you’re still interrupted by toddlers having bad dreams or big kids needing water or another bedtime song. I mean, your baby will eventually become a teenager, right?
So, until then: Hang in there. Call in reinforcement if you need. I get so much sleep these days I’ll even come over to your house to help you get some sleep! I’m not kidding- just give me a call and I’ll pack my overnight bag and it’ll be like a slumber party, except you get tucked in and I take over the night shift in whatever way works best for your family.
Or, try some of these baby sleep tips:
- Do a bedtime routine with your baby and then put yourself to sleep too!
- Keep your house dark and quiet at nighttime. That means no Netflix at 3am.
- Nap during the day. Pass off baby to someone else and catch up on your sleep.
- Have your partner take over the morning feeding so you can sleep in a few extra hours. It works better than trying to pass off the middle of the night feeding and won’t ruin your milk supply if you’re breastfeeding.
What do you mean about ruining your milk supply if you pass a night feeding to your partner?
If you’re breastfeeding it’s advised not to skip night feedings to have your partner give the baby a bottle. First off, you body produces prolactin, the hormone for breastfeeding, at its highest levels at night. Secondly, in order to keep your supply you need to feed the baby when the baby needs to eat. If the demand is being met elsewhere, then your supply can go down because your body thinks the baby isn’t hungry.
A few nights like that and your breasts may not make as much milk at night (or during the day) as they did before.
This is especially important in the first 6 weeks as your body establishes the supply it needs for your baby.