“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet.” – Romeo and Juliet
As much as I love being a doula and all that it entails, I really wish whoever coined the modern term would have chosen something different.
Let’s face it- the first time you heard the word you probably said, ” a do-what? What the hell is a doula?!” And that would be a pretty common reaction seeing as the word gives pretty much zero indication as to what this job entails. We’ve got teachers who teach, lawyers who study law, plumbers who fix plumbing and doulas who….what exactly does a doula do?
It’s no wonder that spreading the word about doula care is not the easiest job. So many doulas are focused on selling their skills and setting up their businesses, without actually thinking if anyone even knows what it is they are selling! I have noticed, and I’m guilty of this too, that the word DOULA is featured most prominently on the websites and marketing that doulas do. We fail to remember that many people are just coming across the word and beginning to understand what it means. Another huge chunk of people who would probably appreciate and benefit from these types of services will never know we exist because they simply aren’t searching for this obscure word.
Men, especially, find the word very strange. Some describe it as sounding like it has something to do with yoga, others think it sounds like some sort of hippie made-up language. Basically, it freaks them out a bit. “Hey honey, let’s get a doula to come to our birth!” The usual image is of some sort of chanting, drum beating, long skirted, musky smelling woman sauntering in during the birth to do a sage smudging and protect the birthing space. It’s no wonder partners are hesitant at first.
Using language like birth attendant, or birth supporter or even birth coach tends to resonate with the more mainstream crowd and works better to introduce the idea. It actually describes the work we do, since a doula’s role IS to attend the birth, support at the birth, and to coach (I prefer guide and encourage) the woman or couple as the birth happens.
No matter what you call me- here’s what you need to know about Megan the Doula (most people usually just call me Megan, by the way) :
- I support you and your family during pregnancy by discussion your options, helping you find resources, planning your birth and guiding you towards finding your strength and wisdom for birth. I am available to my clients by phone and e-mail and am on call from the moment they hire me. We spend lots of time finding ways to prepare for your ideal birth, connect with your partner, and understand the basics of what giving birth is like.
- I am there by your side during your labour and birth in whatever way you might need in the moment. I am not there to replace anyone (not your doctor, not your partner, nor your nurse) but I make a great addition to the team. A true supporter of birth, I honor your choices, help you get through the difficult and trying stages of labour and birth and am there to massage, encourage, provide assistance to your primary support person and make sure that you are feeling cared for.
Doula. Birth Support. Labour Support. Birth Coach. Hey You.
Call me what you want, and I’ll be sure to answer!
